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Re: Does Ballet Training Make Boys Feminine?

written by Mohabee  on 01.12. at 06:17:10 - as answer to: Does Ballet Training Make Boys Feminine? by Snow King at
Hi Snow King!

My feeling about your particular dillemma, is that your Dad's opinion is moreso reflective of who he is, than it is about you becoming a ballet dancer.

I suggest keep on dancing, despite this distressing opinion. Your Dad only knows what he knows (and very little about ballet), so he's stuck in his old ways. No matter what you do or say, he probably won't become fascinated by ballet, or enthusiastic about his son excelling in ballet school. Sadly, you might look at this as a turning point in your relationship with your Dad.

When you are able, look at yourself in the mirror--a full length mirror is best. Look at yourself from head to toe, then smile. You are who you are, and it sounds like you just need a pat on the back for being you, and for enduring a negative opinion.

Many of us dancers go through life enduring the worst reviews, or the worst disasters that might thwart us from dancing. Stop playing these negative "tapes," and look at the positive experience you have as a dancer, about to perform for an audience. Most guys enjoy the workout, and the exhuberance of flight in the air!

Maturity is about hearing uneducated criticism from one's parents, and moving on, to grow and to flourish, without the negative attitude at home. I don't suggest abandoning your Dad, but now that you know who he is, I'd visit him occasionally, and not at his or your home. Bring along a supportive friend.

Keep us appraised of your progress.

Keep On Dancing!

Mohabee-----------------------------------------I am a serious male dancer.  I have studied dance for eleven years. I'm in class six days a week, often taking two or three classes a day.  I danced Cavalier in NUT last Christmas.>I have a very unsupportive dad.  I didn't begin training until after my parents divorced.  My dad does not appreciate ballet at all.  This is an old issue and not what I'm writing about today.>I had a conversation with my dad last weekend.  He feels strongly that ballet training has made me feminine.  He says when I was little, I imitated my female teachers and the girls in my class too much.  He also says that my male dancer friends are feminine acting and that they have influenced me.  He even thinks wearing tights and dance belt makes me move in a girlish way.>I know that most of what my dad says is ignorant.  But he has made me think.  Could I have some honest opinions about this.  Is there anything to what my dad says about this?>Snow King


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